08 Nov You can have more happiness and less distress…it’s a fact!
Just pause and think for a minute on the heading and sub-heading of this blog posting…
You can have more happiness and less distress…it’s a fact!
and
Happiness…it’s in the detail!
These statements, may not be as they seem…
I was reflecting on a few stressors over the weekend, nothing life-threatening but serious enough to warrant (or so I thought at the time) some concern. But thankfully, I did what I do when I’m thinking clearly and (1) consulted my wise wife and (2) determined to take some affirmative action and try to get the situation under control.
First things first, before allowing my concerns to blow out into high level distress I did something I’d highly recommend anyone to do as an initial step…I checked the facts. Now although the situation to which I’m referring is something that warrants some attention IT IS DEFINITELY NOT as much as a problem as I’d thought it was. I was, essentially, worrying much more than I needed to.
Checking the facts and clarifying the details in and of itself reduced my distress and enhanced my mood…as well as my sense of control over the situation.
There are all sorts of reasons why we don’t see things accurately at times but the most important thing to note is…that we don’t see things accurately at times. More often than not this will lead to unnecessary and often excessive distress; which doesn’t help anything.
That is why, as noted, happiness is in the facts and why happiness is in the details; by clarifying what REALLY IS GOING ON and, just as importantly, WHAT’S NOT GOING ON we can focus on the reality of the situation. If the reality is not as bad as we’d thought, as will often or occasionally be the case then your distress will immediately be reduced and your happiness and positive emotion increased. But, and here’s the rub, even if the reality does highlight a problem then focusing on the facts and on the details will allow you to address this issue more effectively and more constructively.
So next time you’re upset and next time you’re trying to find happiness amidst the worry…look for the facts; focus on reality; delve into the details and I’m pretty sure you’ll find things aren’t as bad as they might have seemend and/or you’re more able to cope than you might, initially, have thought.